Words of Wisdom

Always remember that no matter how bad it gets,
your cat can always wander off and go live with somebody else.

—TK

A public service announcement from the National Salad Fork Safety Council: never run or engage in horseplay while handling your salad fork. Make salad time a safe time!

—TK

Car model names that got rejected:

Kia Sludge Bucket
Chevrolet Monte Hall
Ford Magnum Biscuit Deluxe Cab
Toyota Brick
Honda Cynic
Suburu Wombat Twin Turbo

— TK

From the Stuff-You-Can’t-Make-Up Department: an outlaw on my county’s latest Most Wanted list is actually named “Outlaw.”

 —TK